Making the Most of the Waiting Period (Strategies to Bridge the Gap Until Treatment Begins)

A therapy spot is rarely available right away. After the initial consultation with a pediatrician or at a counseling center, the family is often placed on a waiting list. The wait for a therapy spot can’t be made to disappear, but it doesn’t have to be wasted time.

Bridging the gap means: seeking early counseling, taking advantage of faster access routes within the healthcare system, and keeping daily life as stable as possible until the actual therapy begins. This is not a substitute for treatment. However, it reduces stress and prevents problems from becoming more entrenched in the meantime.

In Germany, on average, several months—often three to six—pass between the initial contact and the start of psychotherapy. For children and adolescents, the situation is further complicated by the fact that there are fewer practices with the appropriate specialization, and travel distance to the practice also plays a role.

It’s important to note: An initial consultation—known as a psychotherapeutic consultation—usually takes place much sooner than securing a spot for long-term treatment. If you keep these two separate, you’ll spare yourself some of the disappointment. While you’re in this waiting-list limbo, it helps to contact several practices at the same time and not take rejections personally. Full appointment schedules say nothing about your child.

The Appointment Service Center of the Association of Statutory Health Insurance Physicians arranges appointments. You can reach them 24 hours a day by calling 116117 or online at eterminservice.de. You do not need a referral for a psychotherapy consultation.

The service center is required to arrange an initial consultation appointment within one week, which should then take place within four weeks. During this consultation, a specialist will determine whether and what kind of help is appropriate. For children and adolescents, this includes up to ten 25-minute sessions.

If an urgent need is identified, acute treatment consisting of up to 24 short sessions may follow immediately. When calling, make it clear that you would like an appointment for the initial consultation and not for psychotherapy itself. This will speed up the process.

In addition to the medical and psychotherapeutic system, there are services that are readily available and usually free of charge:

• Parenting and family counseling centers run by organizations such as Caritas, Diakonie, or Arbeiterwohlfahrt provide guidance on conflicts, school, and behavior. Wait times there are often shorter than at a therapist’s office.
• The bke online counseling service is aimed at parents of children up to age 21. Counseling via email, chat, and in groups is anonymous and free of charge.
• The Social Psychiatric Service at the public health department provides support for acute and long-term mental health issues, also free of charge.

These services do not provide diagnoses or therapy. However, they will connect you with someone to support you while you wait and help you figure out what the next step might be.

What happens at home affects how a child copes with waiting. A few things have a greater impact than they might seem at first glance:

• Routine: Set times for sleep, meals, and screen time provide structure for a stressed child.
• Notes: Briefly jot down any notable behaviors, including the date. These observations are invaluable later during consultations and save you from having to guess.
• Support for Yourself: Anyone supporting a child through a difficult phase quickly runs on empty. Taking breaks, having someone in your circle who’s willing to listen, and delegating specific tasks are part of self-care—not a luxury.

Small, reliable routines are more effective than one big, heroic effort—which no one can manage every day anyway.

Some situations cannot be put on a list. If there are signs of self-harm, suicidal thoughts, or an acute crisis, the rule is: seek help immediately—don’t wait. Points of contact include your local crisis service, city and municipal hotlines, and, in an emergency, 112. The article on crisis hotlines summarizes where and when to call.

All the steps mentioned here are intended as temporary measures. Only a child and adolescent psychiatrist or a medical or psychotherapeutic specialist can determine whether your child has a mental health disorder and what treatment is appropriate. Rückenwind supports you on this journey, but does not provide a diagnosis and is not a substitute for psychotherapy.